Allison, I know I should have more to say about this, but none of it feels interesting. It's one thing to realize that getting what you want is a scary thing; it's another to talk about it in a way that doesn't sound like self-pity from the deeply un-pitiable.
This post reminds me of what Lorne Michaels said about why Saturday Night Live goes on the air when it's supposed to. He said, essentially, that Saturday Night Live doesn't go on because the show's ready, it goes on because it's Saturday Night, it's eleven-thirty and all the camera's are pointed at the cast. Those people are nuts and insecure and they've done the best they can and it's time to go be looked at. And no matter how good they are, they're gonna have to do it again next week.
But still, it's Saturday Night Live, for God's sake.
When I was finishing my dissertation, Michael Barnes told me, "dissertations are not finished; they're abandoned." And he was so right. I handed that thing in and I haven't been able to look at it again since, but they call me Doctor Arthur now.
Actually, they don't. But I am.
And when I finish a drawing, it's hopefully the best one I've ever done. And the minute it's signed and the ink is dry, I'd better be working on another, because the only thing that really matters is the next one.
Thanks for the kind words, but I have another drawing to make.
And, at my core, I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything. Except myself that that's true.